Gay Men, Shame, & Emotional Healing: A Deep Dive with Finn Deerhart & Michelle Melville-Kashon

What does it mean to approach sex not just for pleasure—but for growth, healing, and transformation? In this episode, sexuality counselor Finn Deerhart gets real about the journey from shame to wholeness. He opens up about growing up closeted in the church, navigating double lives, and ultimately transforming pain into purpose. Finn shares powerful insight into the emotional realities many gay men face—especially when vulnerability gets masked by performative intimacy, hookup culture, and internalized shame. Whether you work with queer clients or are on your own healing journey, this is a rich, nuanced conversation about reclaiming erotic selfhood and building emotional fluency around desire.

👉 Join Finn Deerhart LIVE at SHA’s Smart Love and Pride of Sides Online Weekend! 🔗 Register here: https://sexualhealthalliance.com/smar...

This SHA event features Dr. Joe Kort, Dr. Lauren Costine, Finn Deerhart, Silva Neves, Dr. Christopher Wilson, and Brian McNaught—offering expansive sessions on queer identity, intentional intimacy, trauma, and relationship healing.

💡 In This Interview, You’ll Learn:

✔️ What “intentional sexuality” really means—and how it supports personal growth

✔️ How shame shows up in the body before it becomes a belief

✔️ The spiritual power of reclaiming queer eroticism

✔️ How cultural scars around masculinity show up in gay relationships

✔️ Why vulnerability is often masked by performance

✔️ Tips for helping gay clients unpack religious trauma and emotional barriers