RESOURCES : LEARNING & DEVELOPMENT

Throughout my years of coaching, LGBTQ+ clients and allies have found the resources below to be helpful along their journeys toward sex-positivity, mindfulness, and self-discovery. I hope you find these useful as well. Feel free to reach out with any questions here.


Eroticism, Sexuality, & Orientation

  • The Erotic Mind - Jack Morin

  • Arousal - Michael Bader

  • Passion & Presence: A Couple’s Guide to Awakened Intimacy and Mindful Sex by Maci Daye

  • Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life - Justin J. Lehmiller

  • Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life - Emily Nagoski 

  • The Existential Importance of the Penis: A Guide to Understanding Male Sexuality - Daniel N. Watter

  • So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex: Laying Bare & Learning to Repair Our Love Lives - Ian Kerner

  • The Paradox of Porn - Don Shewey 

  • Reclaiming Pleasure: A Sex Positive Guide for Moving Past Sexual Trauma & Living a Passionate Life - Holly Richmond

  • Sexuality Beyond Consent: Risk, Race, Traumatophilia - Avgi Saketopoulou

  • Boys & Sex - Peggy Orenstein

Relationships

  • Mating in Captivity - Esther Perel

  • You Are the One You’ve Been Waiting For: Bringing Courageous Love to Intimate Relationships - Richard Schwartz

  • The All-or-Nothing Marriage - Eli Finkel

  • Wired for Love - Stan Tatkin

  • Modern Romance - Aziz Ansari & Eric Klinenberg

  • Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life - Marshall B. Rosenberg

  • Don’t Be Nice, Be Real - Kelly Bryson

  • Set Boundaries, Find Peace - Nedra Glover Tawwab

  • Getting to Zero: How to Work Through Conflict in Your High-Stakes Relationships - Jayson Gaddis

  • The School of Life

  • Where Should We Begin Podcast

Kink & BDSM

Gender & Transgender

Queer Tantra

Consensual Non-Monogamy

  • More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory - Franklin Veaux & Eve Rickert

  • Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, & Consensual Nonmonogamy - Jessica Fern

  • Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists & Their Clients - Martha Kauppi

  • Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships - Tristan Taormino

  • Designer Relationships: A Guide to Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, and Optimistic Open Relationships - Mark A. Michaels & Patricia Johnson 

  • The Jealousy Workbook: Exercises & Insights for Managing Open Relationships - Kathy Labriola

  • The Ethical Slut - Janet W. Hardy & Dossie Easton

  • The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity - Esther Perel

  • More Than Two Online Polyamory Resources

Touch & Mindfulness

Queer Affirmative Psychotherapy & Embodiment Work

Sex Toys

Additional Personal Development

  • The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man’s World - Alan Downs

  • Out of the Shadows: Reimagining Gay Men's Lives - Walt Odets

  • Understanding Saturn’s Shadow: The Wounding & Healing of Men - James Hollis

  • Phallos: Sacred Image of the Masculine - Eugene Monick

  • I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression - Terrence Real

  • 10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives  - Joe Kort

  • Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself - Nedra Glover Tawwab

  • The Gifts of Imperfection - Brené Brown 

  • Man’s Search for Meaning - Viktor E. Frankl

  • King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine- Douglas Gillete & Robert L. Moore

  • How to Be an Antiracist - Ibram X. Kendi

  • The Body Is Not An Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love - Sonya Renee Taylor

  • My Grandmother’s Hands: Racialized Trauma & the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts & Bodies - Resmaa Menakem

  • Bad Feminist: Essays - Roxane Gay

  • White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism - Robin DiAngelo

  • The Power of Myth - Joseph Campbell 

  • The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, & Healing in a Toxic Culture - Gabor Maté & Daniel Maté

  • The Radiance Sutras - Lorin Roche

  • The Body Keeps the Score - Bessel Van Der Kolk

  • The Denial of Death - Ernest Becker

  • Gods in Everyman: Archetypes That Shape Men’s Lives - Jean Shinoda Bolen

  • Goddesses in Everywoman: Powerful Archetypes in Women’s Lives - Jean Shinoda Bolen

  • Inner Work: Using Dreams & Active Imagination for Personal Growth - Robert A. Johnson

  • Owning Your Own Shadow: Understanding the Dark Side of the Psyche - Robert A. Johnson

  • Gay Sons & Mothers Organization

  • The Roxane Gay Agenda Podcast

Free Phone Counseling

  • The Trevor Project: 866-488-7386

  • Trans Lifeline: 877-565-8860

  • San Francisco’s Suicide Prevention Suicide/Crisis Line:  415-781-0500

  • GLBT National Youth Talk Line:  800-246-7743

  • California AIDS Hotline: 415-863-AIDS

  • AIDS/HIV Nightline: 415-434-AIDS

  • National Sexual Assault Hotline: 800-656-HOPE